If you’re feeling lost in life over 50, the first thing to understand is that this is common for women going through menopause. Not only because we’re dealing with nosediving hormones and changes to our body, but also because menopause hits many of us just as we’re also dealing with other psychologically significant life challenges such as aging parents, empty-nesting, and career stress.
Feeling Lost in Life is the “Midlife Funk” That So Many Women Experience
This is the “midlife funk” that so many women complain about. It can present as an existential crisis that makes you feel lost in life, wondering if your life is on the wrong track. You’re lacking motivation, feel aimless and stuck. You’re floundering and can’t figure out what to do about it. You might not even recognize yourself anymore.
This is why I think it’s so important to reframe menopause as a spiritual awakening, because that’s exactly what it is. It’s an opportunity for women to shift the focus inward and rediscover themselves. Every woman over 50 that I’ve worked with has experienced some aspect of feeling lost in life during menopause. It’s always the catalyst for discoveries and transformations that lead to their soul-fulfilling, highest expansion.
What to Do When You’re Feeling Lost in Life
Here are tips and strategies I use to help my clients reconnect with themselves and find the vitality and purpose in their lives.
Evaluate all aspects of your life
Use the Midlife Compass Tool to evaluate all aspects of your life. It’s so eye-opening to see the visual representation of what parts of your life you’re really struggling with, as well as the parts of your life that are actually great! So many clients are surprised to see that, even in the midst of feeling lost and aimless, they are really doing great in some parts of their lives. It’s important to acknowledge what’s working, what you’re doing well, especially when you’re feeling lost or stuck in other aspects that are really bringing you down.
Identify your desires
It’s so common for midlife women to be disconnected from what brings them joy. We’ve spent so many years focused outward, on other people’s needs and our career goals, that we’ve shut ourselves off from our own emotions. I used to offer workshops based on The Desire Map to help women identify their core desired feelings and then create ways to experience them regularly. I highly recommend the book as a way to help you move from feeling lost to taking small steps to reconnect with yourself.
Create sacred self-care practices
Build in practices that raise your vibration and help you reconnect with yourself. This might include meditation, deep breathing exercises, yoga, dance. Schedule time to pamper yourself in whatever way is soothing to you. That might be a quiet bath with candles, or reading a book, or walking in the woods.
When you’re feeling lost, journal
Journaling has so many proven benefits for mental health. I believe it’s also a sacred self-care practice, but it needs to mentioned on its own. It’s that important. Especially if you’re feeling lost in life and experiencing a midlife funk. The act of writing every day about what you’re experiencing will help you understand the complexities of it, and can ultimately help you discover ways to move forward.
Identify limiting beliefs
This is the one that’s the hardest to do on your own, but it’s also the most important. Limiting beliefs are on repeat in our brains, so unless we have someone else point out that they aren’t true, it can be hard to identify them as limiting beliefs. This is why coaching is so powerful. This is what I do with my clients. If you want to try to do this on your own, this is where your journal becomes a powerful tool for you. Read through some of your previous entries with fresh eyes and ask yourself, “Is this really true or is this a limiting belief?”
Use affirmations to empower yourself
Just as limiting beliefs are on repeat in our brains, you can choose to create your own statements on repeat. When you create positive, affirming statements and intentionally repeat them, you can shift your attitude, outlook, vibrational level, and create real change in your life. This is the power of manifesting. To make it effective though, you need to mindfully create or use affirmation statements that you can believe are true and that will uplift you. Ideally, you create these statements to specifically target the limiting beliefs you’ve been repeating. When I coach women through this process, we create specific affirmation statements to counteract the limiting beliefs. Feel into the statement before you decide to use it. The magic that makes it work is whether you feel that it is true and possible for you.